Last updated on September 9th, 2019
Mars by Andrew Mayher is an unusual story and explores love through a different avenue.
The Good
- A good premise for a story.
- Deep story
- Imaginative
- Undertones to the story.
The bad
- I didn’t always enjoy the writing.
- Too much showing and not telling.
- Random example (taken from location 2000 on Kindle): “Topaz sounded like a mad scientist, be he knew what it would mean.”
- Possible change: Topaz had hair which stood frazzled. His eyes were wide, and he spoke with quick, short pauses until his face became flush. As his voice quivered, he leaned close into Eve and said, “And what if Destiny destroys everything? You’ll just be creating Mars all over again, except this time you have no one to save.”
- Try to get the readers to feel the story through descriptions of places and smells and make the characters come alive.
- Random example (taken from location 2000 on Kindle): “Topaz sounded like a mad scientist, be he knew what it would mean.”
The unsure*
- Good story premise but poor execution.
*My opinion: what I didn’t care for or do not prefer. This will not lower a rating unless it overly distracts from the story.
I wanted to like this story, but I found the story a little slow after the solid opening chapters.
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Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
